Sunday night, almost a week ago, I was in church. Pastor Tom was preaching about serving and, as he always does, he gave an invitation that night to respond to God's word. So I was standing at my seat, and I KNEW I needed to go up and pray. But I hate doing that. I don't know why. God has to work on that in me. Anyway, I was like, "NO! I don't want to go!" And the Holy Spirit was like, "No, Melissa! GO!" So as soon as the music started, I went up there. So I'm kneeling at the altar with my hands covering my eyes, praying, and I just start crying. There are tears just running down my face. So I finish praying, go back to my seat, Mom gives me a hug and asks if everything is okay. And here is what I say with tears streaming:
"I just want to go to Africa."
No joke. That's why I was crying. And it's true. I really just want to go to Africa. I mean, I would gladly ditch school, skip college, and live in Africa, teaching English.
I just want to go to Africa.
Now K-Love has a contest where you can go to Africa and China and India, so I entered. And I know that God has given me the desire to go to Africa because I could not have come up with it on my own. They are announcing the final winner today in a few minutes and I'm soo nervous. I don't know why. But I really want to go. It's like tearing me up inside. Not even kidding. I want sooooooooo desperately to be in Africa. God gav me this desire, and it says in Psalms that God gives us the desires of our hears, so I've been praying that I will win this. At the same time, I know that the timing could just be wrong for me to go there. I'm just trusting God. Oh man, is this it?...
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