Last Day Of So Much.

Tomorrow is our last day in India.

My heart is crying, but not about saying goodbye to this place. It's crying about saying goodbye to people, to histories, to stories, to memories, to possibilities.

I am seeking God more and more as I try to decipher His will and His words. Man, it's hard.

Debriefing was this morning. Shopping this afternoon. I still have not found a kurta. Perhaps I won't.

Home. Home. Home.

Maybe if I click my heels together three times, I will be there, with all of this behind me. All of THIS. This hurt and this pain and this sorry-ness. But it probably won't happen. That's the thing with life. You have to LIVE it. You can't just sit by and hope something happens to you. It might, but sometimes you have to do it. Sometimes you have to get up, and take that first step into the unknown, knowing that the Lord will take your hand and lead you down the twisty, dark, scary path.

I'm about to take my first step. I'm holding out my hand, knowing in my head that God will take it, but not really knowing in my heart that He will.

Sometimes you just need a good cry.
Like right now.