Stressing Out.

I'm freaking out.

Not even kidding. I'm going to have a break down any time within the next 2 or 3 days.

I was almost crying earlier today when Kristin and I were at the GC. And Shaun was playing ping pong, so I gave him a hug, and felt a little better. But seriously. I have no idea how I'm going to get everything done.


French homework.
Book to read for English.
Philosophy paper to write.
Philosophy study guide to fill out.
Cross-Cultural Ministry study guide to memorize.
Old Testament notes to review.
Aerobics grade to check.
French exam to prepare for.
English Blue Book to do on Monday.
Finals all next week.
Birthday plans for Shaun.
Christmas presents to buy.
Stuff to pack for home.
Get Whitney moved out and Amber moved in.
Clothes to fold.
Shaun to pray with.
Friends to remember.
Time to talk to God.
Interview for The Herd tomorrow right before Mission Center.
Philosophy review Sunday night.


I feel sick to my stomach every time I think about all I have to do. It will be a late night. And a late weekend. And a stressful finals week.

I'll be home soon. Can't wait. 6 weeks of not worrying about anything to do with school. Glorious.

Freaking out.
So stressed.

Everyone's just saying, "It'll be okay. You'll do fine." But the thing is, they don't know that. If I don't do good enough on my finals, I will lose my scholarship. Then I need to find $4000 for the next semester. Good luck, Melissa.

I know that God wants me here, and He'll provide a way. But I'm having a hard time believing that right now. I don't want you to say that He's still in control. I know He is.

All I want is for people to be there with their mouths shut. I want them to just listen and give me a hug when I want one. They don't need to have anything to say. It's okay for them to be quiet and just let me talk. And if I cry with them, they just need to sit and hold my hand.