How He Loves Us.

Last time I saw You, You had just knocked on my door. I was dressed up, reading for our time together. The door swung open while I was still at the top of our stairs, and You stepped inside smiling at me, beaming at me, so excited that I wanted to be with You.

You looked amazing. I couldn't take my eyes off of You. I tried looking away, embarrassed by the love that was so evident in Your eyes. And when I tried, Your gaze held my face anyway, holding it in place, freezing me.

As I walked down the stairs, You held out Your hand for me to take. As I looked at You, You whirled me out the door, spreading You arm to show me the scene beyond my front porch.

I looked.

And there... painted in the sky in indescribable shades, was the most beautiful sunset I ever saw, created just for me by You. The colors mixed, blending together to perfection, like Your smile, like Your love, like Your grace. It made my breath catch, seeing it, seeing You. You started laughing as You took in my look of joy and awe. Your laugh was brilliant, genuine, tinkling like a glass being tapped at a wedding reception so that the couple awkwardly kisses.

He is jealous for me, loves like a hurricane, I am a tree bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy. When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory. I realize just how beautiful You are and how great Your affections are for me.

Then I blinked, and things were different.

You still knocked on my door, and when I descended the stairs, You were there waiting. You showed me the sunset, and I was in awe. But then the sunset faded, and it was just You there. Just You.

I say "Just You"... but it was so much more. It was YOU. I am so unaware. I told You, "I want to be aware. I want to want You." You said, "Okay."

You withheld water, but I never thirsted for You.
You withheld food, but I never hungered for You.
You did great things, terrible, wonderful things, but I never cared.

I'm ready to thirst, to hunger, to care.
I'm ready, and though I'm scared...
You are still there, showing me the sunset, showing me Yourself.
You were so much more beautiful than the sunset. The Creator is greater than the created. Always.

So Heaven meets Earth like a sloppy, wet kiss and my heart turns violently inside of my chest. I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way He loves me.