Not-So HAPPY WEDNESDAY.

Today is HAPPY WEDNESDAY.

But it is not, in fact, a very HAPPY WEDNESDAY.
I don't know why.
I'm just not feeling it.

I know, I know.
It's HAPPY WEDNESDAY.
I have to make it a HAPPY WEDNESDAY.

But part of me doesn't even want to.

I kind of just want to cry.
To crawl into my bed and cry.
And then have someone come and sit and hold my hand while I cry.
But... that isn't going to happen.

Let's waste time.
Chasing cars.

I miss my home.
I miss my Mom and Dad.
I miss my cat and my dog.
I miss walking in my front door at home, the new front door, on the new front porch that isn't done yet, with the new interior that isn't done either.

I miss my life at home.

I miss working with Cody and Azzy.
I miss eating lunch with my Mom.
I miss shooting with my Dad.
I miss just talking to my Mom everyday.

I miss my church family, I miss not being a part of what's going on at home.
I miss being in the youth group, being one of the kids.

I want to go home.

I never felt like this last year.
Last year, I was so excited to be on my own, to be away from home, to be ME, not my parents' kid. But now...I guess the novelty is gone and I'm done.
I won't go home home again until next summer.
I won't see the green carpet in my room and my blue walls until I'm almost 20.
I won't see Molly until then, or my thimbles, or my Hope Chest.

I'm home-sick for the one of the first times since I came to Oklahoma.

I Really Like Cemeteries - Is That Weird?

Oh gosh.

TWIRP date tonight

I got the brilliant idea that we should go to Eskimo Joe's in Stillwater. So I find the directions on how to get there, and Shaun and I leave around 5:00.

We go to Wal Mart so we can get gas before heading out, but as we're driving down the road in front of Wal Mart and the mall, the car two cars in front of us swerves and hits the person in the other lane. So we pull over, the car in front of us stops to make sure everyone is okay and we call 911. Fifteen minutes later, the cops show up...but Shaun spends the next 45 minutes directing traffic. No joke. (Everyone involved in the accident was fine, by the way)

Finally we get on the road, an hour later than planned.

We drive to Stillwater, but turns out that not only are my directions bad, but there was an OSU game. Of course.

Everywhere we look there are people in orange, walking down the road, standing outside of restaurants, waiting to get in. It was like orange mayhem.

And we can not find the restaurant. We turn down random roads for like 15 minutes before finally stopping and asking where to go. The lady who gives us directions just laughs because...

Eskimo Joe's was packed with the color orange. Everywhere you looked there was someone with an orange shirt or orange pants or orange ANYTHING. Meanwhile, Shaun had on black and I was wearing a tan skirt and a pink shirt. We stood out like a sore thumb. Not only that, but it Was open seating, so it was like a free-for-all in there...like all of the animals had been let out of the zoo. There was NO way we would be able to find a table.

So we decide to go to Mexico Joe's. Yes, Mexico Joe's. And it is the same way. So we try Red Lobster...and there is again orange everywhere. People were waiting for table outside, waiting inside, it was crazy.

By this time I'm about to cry, thinking I completely anhialated our date...thinking he thinks I'm dumb, that this was a totally lame idea.

Finally we just go to Chick-Fil-A...but we were again one the only people in there without OSU orange stuff on. Kind of awkward and embarassing. So yes, we drove over 100 miles to eat at Chick-Fil-A. Oh my word. It was so... I don't even know.

It was horrible at the time, embarassing, every negative fill in the blank word you can think of. Now, it's mostly just funny. Who would have thought there would be an OSU game on the same night of our Twirp date and that we would get there to eat at the exact same time as everyone who had just seen the game? Well, God knew. He held us up at the traffic accident for a reason. Maybe we would have gotten food poisening at Eskimo Joe's tonight. I don't know.

Instead, we got to talk a lot (mostly about cemeteries and how I think love can change the world - if that's not hippie sounding, I don't know what is) and we now have a date story we'll never forget.

Unfortunately.

Oh Gosh.

And They Call Me Happy Go Lucky

Mm...

I want it to rain and turn cold.
In that order.
I want it to be hat and coat weather, because I like that weather.

Last night was 80s movie night with my hall. We went and saw "Hairspray"
Here's a picture of me and some of the girls.



One of them (Kelly - she's not in this picture) said that I look like an 80s supermodel because of my shoes. I actually really liked my outfit...it was fun. We went to Braum's and then the movies then Wal Mart....

...and I bought some really cute new shoes for like $4.50. It was exciting.

I took a nap this afternoon and worked on Civ and studied for my Intro to Exceptional Child test that I have on Wednesday. I have more homework that needs to be done still, but I'm going to the library with Shaun later.

Love is in the house and the house is packed...

I want to do something exciting...
Like go hiking or something..
Like go to 6 Flags.

I have to take care of my pay check from last week.

Wow, 6 Flags is EXPENSIVE....like $50.00 just to get in. I really wanted to go for our 1 year anniversary...but... we're both poor college kids, so that probably won't happen.

I'm doing an Old Navy survey so that I get 10% off next time I go there.

Okay. Well.
That's all for now.

Update.

First Civ test done. Phew.
I wrote until halfway down the last page and included Parker's Olive Garden coloring menu and apparently Dr. Sanders laughed and said it was a pleasant surprise. :)

I start obvservations on Thursday. I'm nervous. Seriously.

Flag football was last night. We lost. We're in A League and the girls on the other team were seriously HUGE. We had four or five girls get hurt. It was so cold. I had on my OBU sweatpants up until I went onto the field and a coat and everything.

I can't type. I keep hitting wrong keys and too many keys.

I'm in charge of craft this week at Mission Center. No idea what I'm going to do. What kind of craft do you make with inter-city kids who know more about drugs and alcohol and gangs than they do about Jesus?

I am so blessed.

Brad comes home this week from Iraq. I am so excited, even though I might not see him until Christmas. I hope he finds a way to come to Oklahoma and visit me. Maybe I'll take him out to coffee so we can talk...about lots of stuff. I can't wait to see him again.

I watched "Saved by the Bell" a lot the last few days. I'm done with season three and will start season four next. And I slept for over an hour...while my clothes were washing and drying downstairs. It was beautiful. I love naps.

I need self-discipline and self-restraint. The girls laughed at me when I said that in staff meeting yesterday.