I made it to Virginia! My bed is made; I am exhausted; Britt Nicole is playing from my speakers. So far, so good!
There were several surprises upon arrival:
1. I need five Southern Baptist churches to be prayer partners with me while I am serving abroad. Oops. Didn't know that part!
2. I signed up for a ministry team... so of course, I picked children's ministry. I don't really know what that entails, but it should be fun!
3. The other 2 Alaskans are here already - the other girl rode here in the van with me.
The internet seems spotty at best.
I would be really excited right now if I were not so tired! Nap, shower, then lunch!
7.27.2010
7.25.2010
Okay.
I just checked my e-mail for the first time in about a week.
And okay, I am excited.
A lot.
I had 5 new e-mails, all about getting Visas and such. They were encouraging words from team leaders and people who will be at FPO.
This will change my life. I will become more Christlike. This is good. This is good because He is good.
And okay, I am excited.
A lot.
I had 5 new e-mails, all about getting Visas and such. They were encouraging words from team leaders and people who will be at FPO.
This will change my life. I will become more Christlike. This is good. This is good because He is good.
Last Few Days.
Thursday
What a blessing-filled night!!
-"I'm so mad I could DANCE!"
-beautiful necklace and bracelet that are already providing assurance. "Have Faith" then... "Just because you have faith doesn't mean it will be easy."
-journal that is waiting to be filled with my words, thoughts, and emotions during some period of the next two years.
-encouragement from women at my church who serve a pivotal role in my life as role-models and mentors.
I am so blessed.
Friday
Then King David said to the whole assembly, “My son Solomon is young and inexperienced. The task is great because this palatial structure is not for man but for the LORD God.” 2 Chronicles 29:1
This task that I am fixing to start… ooh, it is great!
I have been rather selfish lately, concerned with building my own kingdom, wanting my own life and plans to be brought to fruition rather than His. When He showed me this, I felt great remorse and shame.
Who am I that I should claim to be greater, to know more, to be more important than the Most High God? My view of myself was severely disjointed. Praise the LORD that He is faithful still.
His kingdom must be greater. My desire to serve Him must be all encompassing. He must fill every crevice, every nook, every cranny of my life. And if He doesn’t, I will be ineffective.
I am young an inexperienced… the structure I am building is not for man, but for the LORD God. I have His spirit within me that will guide, comfort, and strengthen me. I must trust in that.
Saturday
Three words: Buzz Lightyear Dancing.
Sunday
Tonight is the first night I’ve felt really, deeply sad about the next stage of life, about leaving things, people, memories… everything I know.
Everyone reminds me that “this will be great!” and “the Lord will do great things!” and I know they’re right. I know they are. And I know that His plan is higher and better than mine. He has things in the works that are completely incomprehensible to me right now.
But this afternoon I went to a soccer game and said bye to a friend, one I won’t see for two years. He’ll get married in that time and do who knows what. He’ll probably move somewhere else. Other friends will be juniors and seniors in college when I get back. And that’s hard.
It’s hard realizing that Alaska does not cease to exist when I leave. I am the center of no one’s world (but my own, and far too often is that true). My parents will continue to work; friends will start school next month; winter and snow will come.
And I will not be here. Ha, I feel so emo right now. Funny – odd – how emotions and my view of the world can change so swiftly, so drastically… here today, gone tomorrow.
Chris and I decided to find a verse that encompasses our relationship, one to which we can cling when things are tense from being long distance. No final decisions yet on which verse it will be.
T-25 hours until take off to Virginia.
What a blessing-filled night!!
-"I'm so mad I could DANCE!"
-beautiful necklace and bracelet that are already providing assurance. "Have Faith" then... "Just because you have faith doesn't mean it will be easy."
-journal that is waiting to be filled with my words, thoughts, and emotions during some period of the next two years.
-encouragement from women at my church who serve a pivotal role in my life as role-models and mentors.
I am so blessed.
Friday
Then King David said to the whole assembly, “My son Solomon is young and inexperienced. The task is great because this palatial structure is not for man but for the LORD God.” 2 Chronicles 29:1
This task that I am fixing to start… ooh, it is great!
I have been rather selfish lately, concerned with building my own kingdom, wanting my own life and plans to be brought to fruition rather than His. When He showed me this, I felt great remorse and shame.
Who am I that I should claim to be greater, to know more, to be more important than the Most High God? My view of myself was severely disjointed. Praise the LORD that He is faithful still.
His kingdom must be greater. My desire to serve Him must be all encompassing. He must fill every crevice, every nook, every cranny of my life. And if He doesn’t, I will be ineffective.
I am young an inexperienced… the structure I am building is not for man, but for the LORD God. I have His spirit within me that will guide, comfort, and strengthen me. I must trust in that.
Saturday
Three words: Buzz Lightyear Dancing.
Sunday
Tonight is the first night I’ve felt really, deeply sad about the next stage of life, about leaving things, people, memories… everything I know.
Everyone reminds me that “this will be great!” and “the Lord will do great things!” and I know they’re right. I know they are. And I know that His plan is higher and better than mine. He has things in the works that are completely incomprehensible to me right now.
But this afternoon I went to a soccer game and said bye to a friend, one I won’t see for two years. He’ll get married in that time and do who knows what. He’ll probably move somewhere else. Other friends will be juniors and seniors in college when I get back. And that’s hard.
It’s hard realizing that Alaska does not cease to exist when I leave. I am the center of no one’s world (but my own, and far too often is that true). My parents will continue to work; friends will start school next month; winter and snow will come.
And I will not be here. Ha, I feel so emo right now. Funny – odd – how emotions and my view of the world can change so swiftly, so drastically… here today, gone tomorrow.
Chris and I decided to find a verse that encompasses our relationship, one to which we can cling when things are tense from being long distance. No final decisions yet on which verse it will be.
T-25 hours until take off to Virginia.
7.16.2010
Ten Days.
I head to Virginia in 10 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...
Top 10 Things I'm Looking Forward To Most About Moving Overseas: (in no particular order)
10. Drinking chai everyday and buying it for about 2 cents from street vendors.
9. Seeing elephants walk down the street in the middle of a bustling city.
8. Bright colors contrasted againts dirty buildings.
7. The simplicity of it all.
6. Never being cold. Ha.
5. Aamir Khan everywhere I look. But not really. But maybe.
4. Buying my own groceries and cooking my own food in my own apartment... with a roommate. Also, having a roommate again (Yay, Ginny!!)
3. Adventures!!!!!
2. Diving into the school system of another country, learning how it works and moves and breathesl; watching students discover life; helping teachers be more effective in their lesson planning and execution.
1. The confidence that I am being obedient.
Top 10 Things I'm Looking Forward To Most About Moving Overseas: (in no particular order)
10. Drinking chai everyday and buying it for about 2 cents from street vendors.
9. Seeing elephants walk down the street in the middle of a bustling city.
8. Bright colors contrasted againts dirty buildings.
7. The simplicity of it all.
6. Never being cold. Ha.
5. Aamir Khan everywhere I look. But not really. But maybe.
4. Buying my own groceries and cooking my own food in my own apartment... with a roommate. Also, having a roommate again (Yay, Ginny!!)
3. Adventures!!!!!
2. Diving into the school system of another country, learning how it works and moves and breathesl; watching students discover life; helping teachers be more effective in their lesson planning and execution.
1. The confidence that I am being obedient.
7.13.2010
Obedience Over Uncertainty.
Two weeks from now, I'll be in VA - reunited with Katie, Melinda, and my other peeps. Oh, happy day! The emotions are mixed... but I keep referring back to things the Father revealed to me on Sunday.
Obedience over uncertainty.
Not allowing the fear of losing something overwhelm the excitement of what could be gained.
Courage to "go there."
My fears are abased on both uncertainties and the certain knowledge that life will change over the course of the next two years. I focus on what I will lose rather than one what I will gain. When that shift happens, doubt, fear, and a sense of aloneness creep in. They shove out any excitement I could have. I am scared to think about what could happen, though - scared that my deepest dreams will not be realized.
Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart."
While studying Ruth last semester, I was struck by the idea of "going there." Kelly Minter wrote in "Ruth: Loss, Love, and Legacy," "Rut was about to 'go there' [with God as she approached the threshing floor]... Some places we can only go with God by ourselves - there's just no way to take anyone with us. It was simply a walk of faith, a humble obedience with no strings attached. And this is the way we must approach our own threshing floors. Without demands. Sometimes in the dark. Alone. But with the expectation that God will always be faithful and good." (92)
I must go there. I must, again, put everything on the threshing floor. I must allow myself time to be alone with Him, as Ruth and Boaz were alone together. I must share with Him; I must dream and think; I must determine the desires of my heart.
David did that, too. He went there. He stepped out of the battle line, though no one else would, and he went to war with Goliath. Before that, he went before the King. He was not afraid, though he could not see exactly how it would end. He was obedient. His faith in the Father was more than enough to give him the courage He needed.
Obedience over uncertainty.
Obedience over uncertainty.
Not allowing the fear of losing something overwhelm the excitement of what could be gained.
Courage to "go there."
My fears are abased on both uncertainties and the certain knowledge that life will change over the course of the next two years. I focus on what I will lose rather than one what I will gain. When that shift happens, doubt, fear, and a sense of aloneness creep in. They shove out any excitement I could have. I am scared to think about what could happen, though - scared that my deepest dreams will not be realized.
Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart."
While studying Ruth last semester, I was struck by the idea of "going there." Kelly Minter wrote in "Ruth: Loss, Love, and Legacy," "Rut was about to 'go there' [with God as she approached the threshing floor]... Some places we can only go with God by ourselves - there's just no way to take anyone with us. It was simply a walk of faith, a humble obedience with no strings attached. And this is the way we must approach our own threshing floors. Without demands. Sometimes in the dark. Alone. But with the expectation that God will always be faithful and good." (92)
I must go there. I must, again, put everything on the threshing floor. I must allow myself time to be alone with Him, as Ruth and Boaz were alone together. I must share with Him; I must dream and think; I must determine the desires of my heart.
David did that, too. He went there. He stepped out of the battle line, though no one else would, and he went to war with Goliath. Before that, he went before the King. He was not afraid, though he could not see exactly how it would end. He was obedient. His faith in the Father was more than enough to give him the courage He needed.
Obedience over uncertainty.
7.07.2010
God Has Chosen You.
This post blessed me a lot today. For your ease of also being encouraged, I copied it here.
Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: John 15:16 KJV
God was the one who formed you, gave you the breath of life, and brought you into the world. He did this so that His arms could embrace you and His love could keep you—He wanted you to know that your relationship with Him would always be of more value than the things He would have you do for Him. He wanted you to be certain that He loved you completely before you ever did anything in His service, so that your service would never become a way of trying to earn His love or favor.
As you came to know His heart and hear His voice, you heard Him speak a call to your life. This call would mean that He would never ask you to do anything for Him that He expected you to do without Him. He alone would be your sufficiency. His only desire is that you daily open your heart to His resources—never saying, “I can’t,” without also being able to say, “He can!”
You are now in the place He has called you. He has made no mistakes in leading you. Even in the hard places He is working out what is best—not only for you and for others, but also for His Kingdom. He is not looking at your statistics or programs to measure you; He is looking at your heart to see if you are faithful. He wants you to know that the results of your obedience are for Him to determine. Be assured that it is His presence that will keep you and make you strong.
You are in God’s place at God’s perfect time. Your days are in His hands, and He is your future. He has gifted you and placed His hand upon you to bless you and make you a blessing. The burden of your ministry is not yours to carry—as you rest, He will work; as you abide, He will bring fruit; as you sow, He will give the increase. He is your shield and your exceeding great reward.
He is your provider. He will take care of you. He will nurture and sustain you. His Spirit is the wind to cool you, the water to refresh you, the power to enable you, the oil to anoint you, and the river that flows through you to touch the lives of others. Continue to be God’s man, in God’s place, doing God’s will, in God’s way, and always remember—God has chosen you!
I've felt a bit of anxiety lately, as I face the fact that there are just 2 and a half weeks left. I received my ticket to VA today; I'm excited. Things are changing. I will stand on the Rock.
Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: John 15:16 KJV
God was the one who formed you, gave you the breath of life, and brought you into the world. He did this so that His arms could embrace you and His love could keep you—He wanted you to know that your relationship with Him would always be of more value than the things He would have you do for Him. He wanted you to be certain that He loved you completely before you ever did anything in His service, so that your service would never become a way of trying to earn His love or favor.
As you came to know His heart and hear His voice, you heard Him speak a call to your life. This call would mean that He would never ask you to do anything for Him that He expected you to do without Him. He alone would be your sufficiency. His only desire is that you daily open your heart to His resources—never saying, “I can’t,” without also being able to say, “He can!”
You are now in the place He has called you. He has made no mistakes in leading you. Even in the hard places He is working out what is best—not only for you and for others, but also for His Kingdom. He is not looking at your statistics or programs to measure you; He is looking at your heart to see if you are faithful. He wants you to know that the results of your obedience are for Him to determine. Be assured that it is His presence that will keep you and make you strong.
You are in God’s place at God’s perfect time. Your days are in His hands, and He is your future. He has gifted you and placed His hand upon you to bless you and make you a blessing. The burden of your ministry is not yours to carry—as you rest, He will work; as you abide, He will bring fruit; as you sow, He will give the increase. He is your shield and your exceeding great reward.
He is your provider. He will take care of you. He will nurture and sustain you. His Spirit is the wind to cool you, the water to refresh you, the power to enable you, the oil to anoint you, and the river that flows through you to touch the lives of others. Continue to be God’s man, in God’s place, doing God’s will, in God’s way, and always remember—God has chosen you!
I've felt a bit of anxiety lately, as I face the fact that there are just 2 and a half weeks left. I received my ticket to VA today; I'm excited. Things are changing. I will stand on the Rock.
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