Ten Days.

Today Was a Fairytale.
Taylor Swift.

LOVE.

I have one more day of student teaching.
Where, oh where?!, did the time go?

Well, THAT Was Eventful.

Emergency Room

Double pink-eye (thanks, Roomie!)
Sinus infection (where'd THAT come from?)

Blood sample.
"There's NO chance she's pregnant!"
CAT scan of my brain.
Riding in wheel chairs.

Freaking out - being scared.

Lying bed, watching the Food Network.

So many nurses.
The man who leads music at church. Random.
He said it was nice to meet me. Ha.

New prescriptions.
21 days.
7 days.
So tired.

Is it summer yet?

Tuesday Tribute (Even Though Today Is Sunday).

Oh Katie...

Man, I don't even know how to start this. I am SO thankful for you. Our Father put you in my life at the perfect time, under the perfect circumstances. I can't even express it.

Late night talking.
Exploring.
Photo shoots.
Unspoken understandings.

I am pumped to see what you do and where you go over the next few years. You have my support. I'm pumped to spend WEEKS with you in July and August.

I am proud of you for not losing faith when the world tumbles. You cling firm to what you believe because you know that without it, you are nothing. You speak truth into my life and challenge me to be more like Him. Thank you.

21 Days.

There are three weeks until graduation. 21 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 21 Memories of Life at OBU:
(in no particular order)

21. Mattress surfing down Raley steps.
20. Ultimate Mud Frisbee, followed by a bath in the fountain.
19. Chalking a professor's driveway.
18. Biscuits and gravy with Helena.
17. "Twilight" movie premier... and the pictures that accompanied it.
16. 80s movie night - four times.
15. Dance party in the GC following Spring Affair.
14. Emceeing Biggie. :) :) :)
13. CML Buddy Dates.
12. Ghost Hunting.
11. Benedict Street dates with my BFFFL.
10. Going to "the Nav."
9. Talking with Emily about everything, interspersed with dance parties.
8. North 40 during science with Jenna and Jon.
7. Social Studies Project.
6. When Cody and Heather came up to visit and that whole weekend.
5. Roadtrip - Spring Break 2010.
4. Thanksgiving at Grandma and Grandpa's.
3. Seeing the dinosaurs in Kansas.
2. TBHL.
1. 8th Grade English.

It's been a good run.

Time. Chantal Kreviazuk.

Things are ending.

I'm done with my last class at OBU. I have 9 more days of student teaching. Yesterday I tried on my graduation robe. I'm slowly going through my belongings, getting rid of unnecessary things.

Time. Where did you go? Why did you leave me here alone?

Ruth.

I have been very bitter and angry, not wanting to take off my mourning clothes and lay at His feet, as Ruth did in the presence of Boaz. I have not been wanting to prepare myself, not wanting to end my pity party, not wanting to seek His guidance, comfort, and peace.

I knew that when I was ready, He was too. I felt Him urging.

Delayed obedience is disobedience. Well, shoot.

Talk about a slap in the face. (This was a good thing; when He gives me it straight, it's always good. It may hurt, but that's why it's good. It's making me more like Him.)

Ruth was a woman - she was probably hesitant to go to Boaz, hesitant to lay at his feet, dressed in her best clothes, under the cover of night. There's always a fear of rejection. But when Boaz realized she was there, he offered ultimate redemption, proclaiming his love and devotion to her.

Man.

"Hanging on to every word You speak because it's all that I need. Hanging on to every word You say to light up my way. Even every little whisper, I'm hanging on as if it were my life. I'm hanging on."

Challenge.

I am learning so many new things.

My Africa.

I just watched a video from my time in South Africa. I want to go back so desperately and yet somehow I know that this is not the time. For reasons unbeknown to me, I cannot return yet.

I hate that.

But I trust Him.

In the videos I watched, I heard the kids say my name the way they did: "Moleesa." One boy sang the goodbye song. Vuyi. Mbali. Tahmee. Sofanee. Candace. They were all there. They are all still there. But are they? Are they all there? Are they all okay? Tahmee - has she found a home? My precious girl.

On Friday, we are "Experiencing Africa." I am planning activities for all afternoon; the students will make maps, weave place-mats, go on a safari, read books, learn about apartheid, and find out more about the culture. It's a culminating activity for reading "The White Giraffe." It's been a lot of work getting it together, but I think it will be worth it.

I want them to experience the Africa I experienced. I want them to taste it, to touch it, to feel it, to know it. I want them to be changed as I was. And oh, I want to return. I will wait for His timing, as much as it hurts, as much as I don't want to, I will. His will is greater than mine.

Today I wore clothes from:




I felt very multi-cultural and it was pleasant.

At Lake Hefner.

On days like today, when I feel overwhelmed and slightly awed by the fact that the last four years about to close, I like to just sit and think.

I've been contemplating a lot of things lately. Being His bride. The wedding feast. Kindness. Love. Laughter. I've been reflecting on relationships. School. What I want for the future. Art. Creativity. Who I am.

But more than anything, who He is.

I've had this thought, almost continually - walking down the hall at Cross Timbers, driving, sitting, talking, typing, it's constantly there. And that's that He is on the throne. Literally. Right there, to the right of the Father, seated with all glory and splendor around Him, He is there. Despite the troubles I'm facing right now, despite the work and the stress and the and the and the... He is on the throne. He IS. I know it. I can rest in it.

What the Book says about Him being there? Yeah, it's true. What the Book says about the wedding feast? It will happen. What it says about His return? It's coming. I like that.

I like that my little circumstances in Oklahoma, which seem so big and overwhelming to me, are nothing to Him. Not that He doesn't care - because He totally does - but because He is sovereign over them. He knows how they turn out. He wants me to trust, to chase lions, to be His bride. He wants me for His. I cannot let the things of this world deter me from being His.

You're Beautiful. Phil Wickham.

It. Is. Beautiful. Outside.

I have been wearing shorts after school for the last 3 days. Today I took a nap outside in the hammock. Maybe Oklahoma's not so bad. Ha - I finally realize that, four years later.

The trees are starting to bud.
Flowers are opening up.
The cat is pregnant.

Love is in the air.
Beauty is in the air.



I've probably listened to this song about 200 times (literally) in the last month. I can't help it. So I'm sorry if this is redundant. It's what I've been thinking about. Beauty. Sacrifice. Forgiveness. Bride. Chosen. Sanctification. Kindness. Work Ethics. Love. LOVE.

Love and laughter and life and and and...

Kids.

I treasure this picture from Mission Center. This is what the focus is all about: them. Not me.



And not even with regards to Mission Center, but with regards to teaching. Who cares how my assessment assignment turns out, so long as they understand decimals? Who cares what they think of me, so long as I am kind? Did I laugh with any of them today? Yesterday? This week?

Have I lost my passion?