Another Year Older.

Today is my birthday. I am now 22 years old. I feel that that is much older than 21, though for reasons I cannot really identify. Maybe because I'm a year past the drinking age. Maybe because now I'm also a college graduate. Maybe because now, I've had my own apartment and my own life... and I've had to move away from it all.

I miss Oklahoma. I miss feeling like I have a home - my place - to be.

I love birthdays. :) A lot.

Tonight we are having dinner at home, per my request. Chicken stuffed with spinach and cheese; macaroni and cheese; fruit salad; asparagus; dinner rolls; and then... le creme de le creme: ice cream cake.

Chris bought me a dinosaur egg and it is hatching in my room at Grandma's as I type. We'll have the same birthday, me and the T-Rex. "T-Rex" makes me think of tea, which makes me think of Chai, which I am drinking in a cafe right now. So I think that's what I'll name it: Chai. Or Chai Baby.

Last night I was thinking about the last year. Being 21.

I went to South Asia. I broke up. I served as a bridesmaid in my brother's wedding in New York. I co-founded the MNHC. I climbed mountains. I started dating. I was a Tro-W during welcome week. I moved into my own apartment with roommates and was so blessed all year by one of them. I became OBU's Harvest Court 2009 Best All Around female and I bought a beautiful dress. I spent Thanksgiving with my grandparents for the first time ever. I showshoed up a mountain. I applied for, was accepted as, and chose to serve with the J-man program. I met Katie, with whom I actually just got off the phone. Nice timing. I ran 5K. I learned to play tennis. I started a mini-hat business. I learned to bat. I student taught in 4th grade. I planned and carried out a great exploration activity about Africa for my students. I roadtripped with two awesome girls to North Carolina. I went to Bill Pope's house for dinner. My portfolio and assessment project were kept as examples of good work. I graduated Summe Cum Laude. I began a roadtrip with my parents and boyfriend across the country, meaning that this year, I traveled from one end of I-40 to the other end. I learned a lot. More than I ever thought possible.

Wow. It's been good. Maybe the best so far.

One Day.

This is it. There is one day until graduation. 1 Day. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 1 Memory at OBU: (in no particular order) (ha)

1.

This was too hard. There are so many. Sorry.

- Late night wiffle ball on the tennis courts.
- The GC dance party after The Spring Affair Show and the IHOP coup that occurred thereafter.
- Tagging cars with Helena.
- Tie-dye.
- That time I went to get a haircut, then got distracted, and ended up just driving around Oklahoma for about 2 hours, talking to my Father.
- Dinner at Bill Pope's.
- Harvest Court photo shoots.
- The awkward first meeting with my India family.
- When Dr. Akin called me out on my attitude.
- B-street with Kim.
- Having Emily as a roommate.
- And Katie.
- Pacing at the airport for two hours, then seeing him come through security.
- Summer visits from Helena and Crab Hat Girl.
- When Kim and I went to Wal Mart late one night and that boy jumped in her sun roof at the stop light while we were in the middle of singing "Party in the USA."
- Chair racing in the ARA at a late night breakfast, then falling backward. In front of everyone.
- Working for the Mafia.
- Finding the dead bird in the Kerr attic.
- Movie premiers.
- Photo shoots.
- Ruth.
- That night at Saturday in the Park (but was really Saturday at OBU) when I was really mad at God and He put me in my place. That was really nice.
- Senior year.

Two Days.

There is way less than one half week until graduation. 2 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 2 Things the Father Taught Me During my Time at OBU: (in no particular order)

2. Love. Being in South Africa, spending time with Tahmee, changed my life. Literally. This precious then-3-year-old girl became one of the brightest stars in my life. Through love - legitimate, full, godly love - this girl was transformed and I was there to witness it. No longer was she scared, robotic, and alone. She was a regular girl, playing on the swings, holding my hand, wanting me to tickle her.


If I love like I am supposed to - really, truly - the world will change. People will see that there is more, that cars and money and clothes are not the end all, be all in life.

1. Sacrifice. Ohhhh this was a hard one to learn. It took e on a rooftop, after reading John 12:1-8 over and over and over. I had reached the end of my rope and was broken, waiting on my knees for Him to come. So He did. It was great. But so hard. Learning that I need to be Mary - pouring out my perfume for the King, giving the most important thing to gain a closer relationship with Him...


Sacrifice means saying, "This thing I value is worth less than You and knowing You. It is hard, but must be done. Mary did not pour out her perfume then try and scoop it back into the container. She poured it out and let it be, His feet anointed.

This was a hard post to write. There are so many things He taught me. How could I possibly narrow it down? But these are the things that drastically changed my perception of the world. Other things have to - the importance of sacrifice, obedience, and being less ego-centric.

Three Days.

There is just one half week until graduation. 3 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 3 Professors Who Impacted My Life at OBU: (in no particular order)

3. Dr. Akin - Such creativity and passion for teaching. Inspiring. Honest, sometimes brutally so. But that's often needed in my life.
2. Dr. James - So caring and compassionate. Understanding. Full of grace.
1. Dr. Belshe - My advisor who saw me teach the most out of anyone. Encouraging, loves books. Happy. Has the BEST office of anyone EVER - just scores of bookshelves filled with books - chapter books, picture books, classroom book sets, poetry. Love it.

Thanks!

Four Days.

There is just one half week until graduation. 4 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 4 Places I Visited/Vacations I Took While in College: (in no particular order)

4. Washington, D.C. Random trip during spring break 2007. Seriously? So odd. Whatever. We stepped in gross fountain water. I was thrown into a trashcan. We creeped on the White House.



3. Trip to Seward with Crab Hat Girl! Of course, because of the trip, we have our Crab Hats. There was a great boat ride also. Also, creeping on Sarah Palin. And having photo shoots in Hatcher's Pass. And playing Twister on the Butte.



2. Thanksgiving Trip to Grandma and Grandpa's in Oregon. Mmm... happy. I'm their favorite. It's okay to be jealous.



1. Elvis Presley's birthplace. Best stop EVER on the Epic Spring Break 2010 Roadtrip. Thanks, Heather and Emily for being willing to pull of the highway in order to visit this historical place. It changed my life... Oh, and South of the Border. Thank goodness for Pedro. He lives on.



Honorable Mentions Go To:
- the Shawnee Emergency Room.
- Indian restaurants around the world.
- My 19th birthday trip to Whittier with Cody and Kristina.
- Memphis.
- Dinosaurs in Wichita.
- Beating Emily on the tennis courts.

Five Days.

There is just under one week until graduation. 5 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 5 Songs That Define College For Me: (in no particular order)

5. "Set the World on Fire" by Britt Nicole. It kind of encompasses junior year - the summer after Africa, before South Asia. There is such a burning desire in my to make Him known in the world.
4. "Party in the USA" by Miley Cyrus. Kim and I experienced countless car rides jamming and dancing to this song. Like the time we went to WalMart. We were dancing at a red light, with her sun roof open, and all of a sudden, a boy JUMPED onto the top of her SUV. He leaned in through the sun roof, totally freaking us out. Oh, it was funny.
3. "Vanilla Twilight" by Owl City. Awesome concert (I read "Holes" while waiting for it to start). We danced in the huge crowd. A boy gave me his spot so that I could video this song. I like the imagery - how it describes a relationship between two people. "The spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly."
2. "Makeup" by Jesse McCartney. Oh, Han - you know you love it. Admit it.
1. "I Gotta Feeling" by Black Eyed Peas. The dance party, CAB, car rides, dancing with Em in the apartment. This song has helped relieve so much stress and given me so many reasons to just laugh and savor.

Six Days.

There is just under one week until graduation. 6 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 6 Groups of People who Have Most Impacted My Life: (in no particular order)

6. India Family - Steve, Kyle, Daniel, Jordan, Hannah. Squeezing in rickshaws and vans, eating Jack Fruit, riding elephants, climbing rocks, visiting temples... you helped shape my view of Asia and the world as a whole.



5. Senior Woman's Bible Study - Lindsey, Anne, Spring, Cari, Kim. You encouraged me to pursue the Father, listened to my enthusiasm about Ruth, and supported everything.



4. J-Man Peeps - Katie, Melinda, my small group. Oh em gee. Again, I am so grateful.





3. Roomies - EMILY, Dani, and Megan. Oh man. So many fun times. Em, I'm so glad we got to live together. I would have been SO lost without you this year!



2. Residents - Oh, you girls are precious. And my other former residents - oh, you make me so happy. I love seeing what God is doing in your lives.



1. Other - The girls who most impacted my life: The OCBF and the BFFFL. Time and relationships have changed things, but you two will probably always be the most influential people in my time at OBU. Like, for reals.





OH GOSH! The others -

Monday Night Hiking Club.
My Sisters.
Church (here and in Alaska)
My grandparents, Brad and Paige, my Parents, etc.

Seven Days.

There is just one week until graduation. 7 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 7 Movies Seen While at OBU: (in no particular order)

7. "The Last Song." I feel that our Spring Break 2010 road trip inspired this movie. Don't tell Nicholas Sparks.
6. "High School Musical." Kim and I rocked out to HSM 1, 2, and 3 more times than I can count. Who cares if we're in college? High school lives on.
5. "Twilight" and "New Moon." Midnight premiers both times. Epic. Yes, we squealed when Edward and Jacob came on screen.
4. "Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian." Melinda, Dayla, and I saw this at the midnight premier for my birthday. We wore crowns and thanked people for coming to "our movie."
3. "The Back-Up Plan." I saw this one last night with Emily, Kim, Anne, and Lindsey! It was SO funny. And awkward. The birthing scene in the pool? Oh man... but he kept the penny!
2. "Ghajini" and "Lagaan." I almost left this one off! Oh, Bollywood... We watched "Ghajini" at the game reserve, on slow-motion. It took 5 hours. But I loved every minute of it! It was almost weird to watch it in regular time. Then "Lagaan" we watched at orientation. It was our first introduction to Aamir Khan. The boys all bought Buvan shirts.
1. "Dumb and Dumber." This only makes the list because of what it represents: spending time with friends, doing the random, ridiculous, off-the-wall things that don't make sense to anyone else, but to you it is completely epic. You know the things about which I'm talking: 80s Movie Nights, Playing Twister on the Butte, having dinner with the campus photographer, chalking campus, etc.

Eight Days.

There is just under week and a half until graduation. 8 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 8 Favorite Classes at OBU: (in no particular order)

8. Environmental Science: hanging out on the North 40 with Jon and Jenna, finding animals and poop and documenting the changes in our bird house.
7. Reading Methods 4-8: I started out really scared of teaching 8th graders English. But in the end, I had so much fun!
6. Social Studies Methods: L.A. was great - Chicano art, pinatas, drawing on walls... what a great assignment. I learned so much and had a great time.
5. Philosophy: I really did not understand anything... but I had a great time trying to convince the professor that the Army > Navy. We won't focus on the fact that my grade in that class made me work my butt off last January to fix my GPA.
4. Reading Methods PK-3: Dr. Gregory is SO sweet!! That alone made this class great. Plus, I got to learn phonics!
3. Speech: We gave two speeches all semester. My favorite part though? Wearing an Eskimo dress to be prop for my friend's speech in another class.
2. Art and Music for Elementary Students: We played instruments and did art projects. I got my personality T-shirt out of the deal.
1. Children's Literature: I read really fun books all semester. What could be better?

Nine Days!

There is a week and a half until graduation. 9 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 9 Most Embarrassing Moments: (in no particular order)

9. Wetting the bed. Twice.
8. Dislocating my elbow while riding my longboard.
7. The fact that the nurse knows my name.
6. This one time, while teaching 8th grade English, I was in the parking lot and my skirt flew up in the wind.
5. When Bill Pope gave me an ashamed look after his daughter told him I was dancing in the hallway of their house...to Justin Bieber.
4. The Butt Punch Game.
3. Buying putty to fix the hole we put in the Head RA Apartment from longboarding. Oops.
2. Hahaha - the goat skit.
1. Setting the fire alarm off in Kerr. On a Saturday morning. At 9am.

Running From Camera.

Oh my word. This made me laugh really hard today. So of course, I ran right outside and wanted to try it myself. And - this may be my new favorite thing!

Tuesday Tribute.

To my Family:



Thank you.
With you, I laughed and cried and yelled. I fell in poop. I rode an elephant. I ate my first mango and hosted Mango Talks. I began to like chai. I felt supported, loved, and encouraged everyday. With you, I felt confident about the calling my Father put on my life. I was safe walking to the internet cafe.



We played Nerts and sang songs and went shopping and "Namascar"ed and bought food from vendors and stayed up late talking and joking and playing Truth or Dare. We laughed about my wetting the bed, Hannah losing everything, Jordan never using a squattie, Daniel and Kyle hugging on the couch, Steve refusing to pay "White Man's Tex." Henna. Nose piercings. Aamir Khan. We had our roles in the family.

Steve: Chai maker.
Daniel: music player.
Kyle: Dad.
Jordan: informer of books.
Hannah: clown.



You impacted my life in ways you will never understand. All of you. Thank you for... being you. For being used. For making a difference. For standing firm, strong in who you are as individuals and a family unit. Thank you that we are family. Thank you for making time for us to be family. I look forward to those times so much. I will feel lost returning "home" without you.

So please come visit me. Kay, thanks.

Ruth.

I just finished the Ruth study.
So much I want to say about it... but I'll just say this:

Ruth did not know how everything was going to turn out. She couldn't flip ahead a few chapters and read the happy ending like I can with her story. All she knew was that her husband died and her mom-in-law was moving back to Bethlehem. So Ruth decided to move also.

She was faithful. She was obedient.

Because of her obedience to return to Bethlehem, the prophecies were fulfilled. Through her romance with Boaz, a Baby Boy was born, thousands of years later, who would be the most important Baby of all time. If Ruth had chosen to stay in Moab, to not leave with her mom-in-law, to do her own thing... it would have been different. The Baby would have still been born because our Father is not limited by us. But Ruth would not have had a part in it.

I cannot help thinking that I do not know how things will turn out post-October 5th. Ha, I can't flip ahead and see the ending my Father sees. All I know is that He has called me to be obedient and faithful. My choosing to be faithful now will have eternal consequences. Perhaps a great love story will come out of this. Perhaps I will revolutionize education. Perhaps I'll become a Bollywood star. I mean, who knows?

Not Ruth.
Not me.

My Father does not change. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever; same from the time of Abraham, Ezekiel, and Amos; same here and overseas; same when I am scared and happy and angry and crying. My human antics do not determine or limit the work He is doing in me and the world.

Last Night.

Last night, I had the opportunity to reflect on my J-man journey so far by sharing it with other people who are committed to the same things as me. The same passions, fear, apprehensions, and uncertainties consume all of us. And that's so comforting. My story is different from most, I think... but I wouldn't change it for anything.

Last night, I wrote in my journal and opened my Bible like always. Ezekiel 2:1-3:15. The Father told Ezekiel that he was being sent to people who would not listen, who would stubbornly shut their ears and refuse to listen. He told Ezekiel to keep speaking, to continue with his message, no matter how long it takes. Then He sent Ezekiel on his way... and Ezekiel went angry and bitter in his spirit. And then... upon reaching his destination, Ezekiel was overwhelmed.

Last night, I realized that I am like Ezekiel in more ways than I care to acknowledge. I have been so bitter and angry, wearing my mourning clothes rather than clothing myself anew with the Spirit. And how ridiculous.

14 Days.

There are two weeks until graduation. 14 Days. So, in honor of that, following is a list of my...

Top 14 Lessons Learned At OBU (Outside of the Classroom):
(in no particular order)

14. Long boarding down a hallway = bad idea.
13. Long boarding when late to class = another bad idea; also = broken elbow.
12. Finding a BFFFL is the best thing you can do.
11. You can always find enough quarters for a sno cone.
10. The best moments are unplanned.
9. Friends become family, especially in foreign countries.
8. Only some people will appreciate wetting-the-bed stories.
7. It's a lot harder to be yourself when you lack an awareness of who you are as an individual, separate from your home and people.
6. To obey is greater than sacrifice. (Well, actually, I learned that first semester, freshman year in Old Testament with Dr. Hall. But it really came to life outside of the classroom.)
5. People will know your business. Just get over it.
4. Photo shoots can make any dull day awesome.
3. It is important to take time to just be with the Father. I really learned that this year. I gained an awareness than I need Him, more than to just fulfill my needs. I need Him for everything.
2. Some memories are indescribable with words and images. I think back on things, like the North 40, French class, and Butt Punching, and all I can do is sit and smile and re-feel those moments.
1. The Father still works. I may not see it or get it or believe it, but He does. He always is because He loves.